Journal

I met with her twice during the first month in which I was in chastity. Those meetings confirmed to me that she was not just a special Mistress but a wonderful woman. A woman who warrants the utmost respect. Intelligent, talented and caring to those deserving that care and love. That however, certainly did not include her slaves.

She also had the capacity and desire to treat her slaves with cruelty and took pleasure from being evil. She has taught me the true meaning of slavery. I am not allowed to merely accept my weaknesses, inadequacies and those things I am denied. I must learn to absorb myself in those sacrifices and failings so that I suffer and hurt. The internal sense of self worth that previous Mistresses have effectively encouraged me to retain have been stripped away by her. My ego, pride and dignity have painfully been stripped away and I embrace the true inadequacies that make me a slave.

I have been interviewed by Jessica Dee, a cross dressing submissive in Bristol who I speak to on Twitter – and who has her own blog. You can read the Q&A here.

I donned the shinies and spiky heels and was the hostess of the day. I sat on the Queen’s throne and was shown around every part of the new play space and kinky shop. It was great fun. I also enjoyed catching up with Dom Strap On and her crew. Then came my moment in the spotlight – the photo shoot and whipping session.

There were three girls dolled up and ready to submit to whatever punishment I saw fit to bestow. I chose a heavy weight flogger, beautifully balanced and versatile for light teasing strokes up to a really vicious sting. Tracy took the pain best – it’s like she had some prior experience as a sub ;)

Seems to me like there are many ready to cast judgment on others, sadly even so-called ‘sister’ Dommes and Mistresses in the UK and from all over the world. The most recent of which is a comment on a product shoot photograph where I am wearing cuffs and a collar. Does wearing certain attire change your orientation? If I wear a t-shirt with “I’m a gay man” written on it, does that transform me instantly into a gay man?

As well as wearing the bondage accessories for a photo shoot, I do actually enjoy bondage – as part of a wild and varied sex life. I don’t see this as submission – in fact I’m getting what I want, when I want, however I damn well want it, thank you very much.
If you want to find out more – you can read my latest blog post over on my sex blog website here.